Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Of Mice and Men

Home life with all males creates a remarkably different life-style than the one filled with four females and one lonely father I experienced growing up. This past week happenings in our chap dominated home really struck me into seeing some truths about males.

For example, Lucas and Daniel wanted to buy dwarf hamsters. I had a hamster when I was young. It was a good memory, except for finding it dead in the cage before sunrise about four months later. I burst into tears and carried its cold fuzzy body to my parent’s bed and cried until they woke up and asked what was wrong. They flipped out. Outside of this sad ending, I find hamsters to be cute and cuddly pets that are fun to watch. I also think it is great for kids to experience the joy of cleaning out the cage. I endorsed buying hamsters and a few days ago my males sent out to Petco and returned with mice! Not loveable hamsters, but…..beady-eyed, long tailed, snake and cat food sort of mice. The very same thing folks buy traps to kill, my sons paid their own saved up money to buy…... The main course snake owners purchase to feed their cobras? They are now family members. Rodent! As if that does not gross me out enough, they were so “affordable” they returned home with three of them!

THIS is why boys need daddies to take them to Petco. Had I been there? After hearing that dwarf hamsters eventually kill each other when they get older, we would have returned with a couple fish.

Another example… husband grew up quad riding and had wanted to buy a boy toy for the last ten years. I resisted. I just hated the statistics on injuries and worried that there would be an accident that could have been prevented had we bought those Legos instead. Two years ago, my dear friend Stephanie, had a heart to heart with me and explained that God made boys a different way, let’s just say “Wild at Heart.” She suggested I encourage the male bonding and adventure to flourish in my guys. She heartened me to embrace it. I came home from that late night conversation and shared it with my husband. I tell you the truth… that very next weekend he went out and bought the first of three quads and the trailer followed shortly after. I am outnumbered on the love of off-roading and I have had to trust my husband’s direction with our sons. Why? I would feminize them to death, if I could….just to keep them safe.

Yesterday Ralph and I went quadding. I was sort of excited about going, especially since the kids were not with us, so I could avoid ulcers worrying about them. It was just the two of us and I packed our lunch and stepped into his male world. I cruised the Hungry Valley following my husband who was having the time of his life. He led me on dusty trails, bouncing around like a toddler in a jolly jump. He gave me some pointers that I definitely needed, as we had only been riding together on sand dunes before, and this rocky desert riding required a totally different approach to staying alive. It started to be fun.  I am beginning to understand why my guys MIGHT enjoy this risky, filthy sport. And yes, I will go again.

From pet mice to quad riding (and everything testosterone-like in between) I am learning that boys desperately want dads to lead them in the ways of  men…. and men need women that will appreciate this leadership.

1 comment:

Stephanie said...

I left a comment yesterday...but I don't see it?? Testing, testing, 1 2 3 :)